And then there was that 'love' thing

Oh life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Romania.
-Dorothy Parker

Since my birthday is just past I am left with some thoughts about the passages of life and where one is at any given time, like right now. I should know by now. But truly I don’t. But here are some musings on a vital facet of life. My life, and the lives of many others, especially once we get beyond a certain age and acquire a tiny smattering of wisdom. Personally, I don’t think any of us are granted any more wisdom than just a tiny smattering.

Anyway, some thoughts on love.

I have been in love many times in my life. There was a time in my youth that I would fall in love four or five times between breakfast and lunch, depending on where I was and what I was doing.

Now content in a truly loving relationship that I hope is for life, I realize that my earlier infatuations, crushes, or infusions of sheer horniness were not 'true' love, even though they seemed, as an emotion, to follow the rules of the real thing as I understood love at the time. Mainly the females at that time only needed to satisfy in such scenarios as follow:

a) Would I like to be intimate with her?

Or

b) Would I object if she came up to me and said: "I'd like to have sexual intercourse with you, and eventually I want to bear your children. “

The female in question could have been a classmate, somebody I’d seen in a coffee shop or on a bus, or an individual in a short skirt riding up an escalator and flashing her undies. Indeed, I have fallen in love for the sake of a chance glimpse of silk on more than one occasion. “Love your panties, will you marry me?”

In terms of my veneration of the various facets of divinely-inspired female pulchritude, I am essentially a 'face' guy. If a female has an adorable combination of eyes, nose and mouth placement, the rest of the package is of much less importance to my enchantment.

Not, of course, that there is anything whatsoever on this earth that deducts from a shapely, rounded bottom, or comforting looking breasts, but if those elements are there in nice proportion, but the face doesn’t work for me then, I am very sorry, I do not want to be there.

Evidence indicates that men and women are different as far as love is concerned. For women, love is a serious business. It should be as they have so much more to lose if it turns bad. For them the commitment is a deeper thing at the outset than it is for men; at least than it is for men in the earlier part of their lives. There is a certain coming together later on and, while it's not a full convergence, at least men and women finally, from middle age forward, hang out in roughly the same amorousness ballpark.

When a man is young his biological imperative is to impregnate as many nubile females as possible. Not that he actually wants the impregnation part to transpire, he just fancies the process that can lead to pregnancy if it is so destined. In other words, young bucks like sex; a lot of steamy sex is cherished and/or fantasized about. Mainly fantasized about, if truth be known.

As it happens, most males spend their formative years biting their knuckles and having tears well up in their eyes due to all the pretty little things out there. Part of the tearing stems from rapture at the profound beauty of these distaff creatures. Another part (indeed the most part) of the tears originates with his realization that he cannot have them all. For, that is indeed what the young lad wants – ‘all’ of them. Some guys, of course, never lose that impulse, and as such can face many complications in their lives.

Of course, it’s a good thing that the quest for possession of all young females is a futile one, or there wouldn’t be any left for the rest of us. Anyhow, it’s the chasethat is of the essence. If your dog chases cars, the big question is always, what would he do if he caught one? If a randy lad of no sophistication chases a pretty girl, what is he to do if she turns around and says, "OK.”? He is going to be terrified, and likely muff his chances badly.

Later in time the boy settles down with his 'one-and-only', thoroughly convinced that this is indeed the real thing. She will be the only one for him for the rest of his life. The problem here is that in his early twenties he has no clue as to what sort of woman would be ideal for him for the rest of his life. This too can lead to complications a few weeks, months or years down the road.

Our divorce lawyers rub their hands each and every time they hear church bells on a Saturday afternoon in June, and not because they are incurable romantics.Fortunate indeed is the person who finds that 'soulmate' right off. I am acquainted with a few such people, and am amazed by both their staying-power and by the fact that they not only hit it right at the start, but that they have consistently been able to work it through.

It can't all be about love -- can it?