See the pyramids along the Nile, see the sunrise on a tropic isle

I have a birthday coming up. Tomorrow, if memory serves. Can never be too sure these days. Just checked. Yep, I’m right. Tomorrow is the 21st. so please feel free to wish me Happy Birthday. I also want cake and ice cream and lots of hugs and kisses and large denomination crisp bills. OK?

I am being silly about my birthday because it is my little way of avoiding lapsing into profound depression at the unspeakable passage of time, or paroxysms of screaming-meemies hysteria at exactly the same thing.

But, I just read something that made me feel better. For years now I’ve been suffering from the realization that the incessant foreshortening of time is invariably going to preclude me attaining what I want in the days I have left. In that, I hope they are many, but ‘one never do know, do one?’ as the inimitable Fats Waller once said. In his case he only made it to 39, so I have a few years up on him. On the other hand he wrote and performed ‘Ain’t Misbehavin’ and that is accomplishment in life enough for any 10 people.

But, I digress. Last year there was a film called The Bucket List in which a couple of old farts, Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, who knew they were dying attempted to get in whatever they had not yet done before they kicked the proverbial.

What they did involved all sorts of activities, some tasteful and some distasteful and considerable travel, too. Their quest was to fit it all in.

Now it is understandable to people past a certain age that youth is truly wasted on the young, and that if I were magically transformed to my misspent youth for another try, there are things I would have done differently. What might have been different were I operating from what limited wisdom I have acquired?

- I wouldn’t have married until I was at least 35.
- I wouldn’t have allowed myself to get stuck in a career that was ill-suited.
- I likely would have had children.
- I would have traveled, traveled and traveled some more.
- I would have pushed my creative endeavors to the hilt.
- And (perhaps this is the most important one of all) I wouldn’t have been afraid to do any of those things.

I had coffee yesterday with a young female friend with whom I have a slight mentor role. She is smart, pretty, ambitious and has the world at her fingertips at age 25. My basic message to her was, go for the gusto, girl, and don’t be afraid to do so. Don’t be limited by convention or the expectations of others. Be your own person and your life will be blessed. She agreed fully; verbally at least. I do hope she acts accordingly.

Back to the article I read that gave me a certain peace-of-mind. What it suggests is, ‘bucket list’ notwithstanding, a body cannot do it all. The writer said that he realized that he would never make it to Japan, for example. “Japan has gotten along fine without my presence for hundreds of years, and I think it will have to continue to do so.” He said he felt likewise about Egypt and Morocco, despite having in the past thought he would like to go to those places. So would I. But what he said was that when he came to that realization that he could not visit every place on his list, he felt “a great liberation.” He was free. Free of guilt and free of a sense of obligation to do it ‘all’.

I think his point is well taken. I asked myself if there is any place ‘new’ I would go to in preference to places I would rather re-visit, and the answer is ‘no’. Not an unqualified no, but a no after due consideration and qualification.

So, I would rather go back to England and Ireland, France and Italy, Belgium and Holland rather than go to Spain, Portugal or Scandinavia, and assorted other European spots that I either haven’t been to, or have no desire to revisit. I would always go back to Kauai because it’s a kind of spiritual home for me. I love the desert southwest of the US and would go back there again. San Diego is always on a ‘must’ list as is the Oregon coast.

But, I have never been to Asia, Africa or Down Under (except for the Cook Islands, which I adored and would go back to), and I just might not make it this time around. That’s OK. I can handle it. Thus far my life has been a good adventure and I hope it continues to be for some time to come.