Friday, January 18, 2008

Everybody's thinkin' of you -- PS I love you

This is indeed a puzzlement. I just read that Graham Greene, one of my favorite novelists, thought that Ralph Richardson, one of my favorite old-school English actors, was an intolerable old hambone who took liberties with the writings of others when he performed. He told Ralph (pron. ‘Rafe’) so in a letter. Now I’m conflicted. Can I still like and admire them both? Sort of like when best friends get divorced. Is it still OK to like both Scott and Zelda?

Anyway, the Greene revelation came about from reading an article in the Globe & Mail’s ‘Books’ section from last weekend. The section was devoted entirely to the collections of selected letters from various writers and performers that have been published in recent times.

Included in the reviews were the epistolary musings of that gay old dog (gay used in both senses of the word) Noel Coward, the astonishing and exhausting Mitford sisters, the aforementioned Greene, and so forth. Enjoyable reviews and I am tempted to acquire some of the collections.

It put me in mind of the fact that letter writing was once an ‘art’ and it is one that has sadly been lost. It may not ever be found again, considering the fact that, in terms of the younger generation, ‘literacy’ (not text-messaging argot crap) is a criterion. Indeed, it is virtually mandatory.


"I'm gonna sit right down and text-message myself a letter." just would not work.

I am as guilty as the next person in this regard. Technology has killed an impulse that had both legitimacy and romance connected with it. But, like you, I am inclined to email. It’s so easy, and you don’t have to deal with the weasels at the post office in order to acquire stamps, etc.

But, there was a time in which I wrote letters. I actually sat down with pen (preferably of the fountain sort, it just went with the territory) and nice stationery, and you turned wonderful words into prose – often very ‘purple’ prose if it was a love letter. Love letters, sigh. Not in the sand, but on perfumed paper. Love letters that closed (you hoped) with ‘Love’ or even better ‘Love Always’ and then this stuff XXXXXXXXXOOOOOOOOO. Man, that was almost as good as sex. In fact, in those days that was about all the carnality a lot of guys got, so it had to do.

And, a body felt obliged to keep letters, to store them away in old shoe-boxes. I still have all the letters sent to me by my steady girlfriend at the end of high school as she carried out her summer job at a resort on Gabriola Island on BC’s coast. I don’t know why I kept them, but I am glad I did. They’re not especially salacious – she wasn’t that kind of girl; well actually she was, but not in her letters – but they’re cherished nevertheless.

I also have letters from later sweeties, and also from male friends, aunts and uncles, my grandfather and many others. They cannot be discarded. I cherish them and the senders who took the trouble to write them. One of my very best friends died in an accident in the spring of 1981. I still have his last letter posted to me while I was living in England for a year. I cherish that letter above all others. It was written only a couple of weeks before his untimely death.

As I say, technology didn’t shoot the messenger, but it changed the messenger. It made all of us lazy seekers of convenience and speed. So yes, I email regularly, and snail-mail virtually not at all. But, I do not text-message, nor do I plan to. I have some standards, and retaining a modicum of literacy is one of those standards.

And, I blog. And my blogs, like so many of yours, keep the letter writing tradition alive. So, there is hope.

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14 Comments:

Blogger thailandchani said...

I can't remember the last time I wrote a letter - as in *wrote*, not typed - and went into any detail. There have been quick notes perhaps, postcard length - but it's probably been twenty years. Really. 20.

Text messaging is something I just can't abide. At all. The chopped up misspelled "u 2 cn c whut i meen" is the greatest eyesore I can think of at the moment.

Real letters. Wow. What a concept! :)

12:25 PM  
Blogger Jazz said...

Oh!!!! Another reason to like you, you know and like Graham Greene! Many years ago, I devoured his books. He's a brilliant writer.

As for letters, I love(d) writing letters. Fountain pen, thick stationery...

Unlike you though, I didn't keep all the letters.

I really miss writing and receiving letters...

12:31 PM  
Blogger dinahmow said...

At various times over the years, I've culled a fair amount of the hoarded paper. And, sometimes, the climate or the "livestock" forced the issue. But, yes, I did keep special letters, as I now keep some emails.
But when a "prpoer" letter, written in real ink, arrives I get a ridiculously "girlie" rush of pleasure. I think all of us who are old enough to remember such things are like this.

And I love GG!

3:04 PM  
Blogger meggie said...

If you live distant from a person, I think a letter is to be treasured & re read. It is like have a small part of the writer with you.
My mother kept letters I wrote to her, & I like to re read them, & remember what I was like back then. I have kept letters from her, as well as my father my step daughter, Aunts etc.

My handwriting is so bad these days, even I cant always read it, but I quite often type our a letter, but always sign in by hand.

4:54 PM  
Blogger Leslie Hawes said...

So much of "letter writing" has been lost. Penmanship, that old dinosaur, is no longer taught.
A big white sheet of paper, with the date at the top, and Dear in the salutation, beautiful handwriting, generous margins, a lick of the envelope, the application of a miniature work of art in the form of a postage stamp...
That's good stuff.

4:55 PM  
Blogger geewits said...

Not to make light of this, okay it sorta does, but whenever someone mentions the lost art of letter writing, I think of Greg Giraldo's hilarious standup bit on this. Ian, you have to watch this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U33a766psr4

P.S. My handwriting sucks, always has, always will. Handwritten letters are really a chore for me.

11:11 PM  
Blogger laughingwolf said...

i'm like you, and cherish the written word, especially penned by loved ones

unfortunately, i've moved too often, many were lost

nor will i ever 'text' anyone... useless twaddle, methinks

7:21 AM  
Blogger CS said...

I love getting emails and I much prefer to email because of how much writing hurts my wrists. But I do miss the thrill of receiving a letter - especialy when it was a fat envelope and you knew there were many pages in it.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Echomouse said...

The weekend Books section of the Globe & Mail is my favourite. I too read that last weekend and had the same thoughts you write about here. I'm particularly interested in the Mitford Sisters.

At least with email, you can print it out and save it. I've done that a few times. It's not the same as handwriting, but I find the value of certain letters to be still important and worth keeping.

8:07 PM  
Blogger heartinsanfrancisco said...

I received a letter from my mother two days after she died.

I love "real" letters, but mostly use email for the immediacy of it because like most 21st century Americans, I'm an instant gratification type.

I wish I had letters from my early years, many of which I still remember vividly but have long since left behind.

It's always sad when friends divorce and expect one to choose between them. But then, perhaps if they had more maturity, they would have worked out their differences without involving lawyers.

8:31 PM  
Blogger jmb said...

That's a really interesting way of looking at it. Our blogs are our letters of today. I like that analogy.
In one way I am not sorry that email has replaced letter writing for I like the immediacy of a reply. When I left Australia and went to live in England I wrote back and forth to my mother. But by the time I got a reply I could not remember what I had said nor did I have a copy to refer to.

So I much prefer email.

10:33 PM  
Blogger Hermes said...

I love Greene. I'm still working through his work but "Our Man in Havanna" is my fave so far.
I never wrote letters. Ever. I don't know why, I just didn't. Once, a man in one of my classes in University claimed that a cursive, handwritten letter was the highest, most noble form of communication and that no one cold be taken seriously if they weren't a master. I disagree.
The shift to print happened long ago. Handwritten letters are not valued as they were.

10:41 PM  
Blogger kimber said...

When I was moving out of my parents' house and off to university, I found a sealed envelope tucked in the back of my closet, fallen between long-forgotten boxes. The handwriting immediately identified it as a letter from my great-aunt, who had died two years before. When I opened it, I discovered a letter which (I assume) she had sent to me before I went to Europe, for it was filled with good wishes for this great journey upon which I was about to embark, and all the glorious adventures that lay before me. I cherish that letter; she lives on through her words.

And I love the Mitford sisters. Jessica has always been my hero.

8:20 AM  
Blogger Cycling Goddess said...

Great post, so nostalgic. I'm not a letter writer either but will always write a little paragraph (or novel lol) in cards.

I do text, can be a lot too. But I write "you" instead of "u", "are" instead of "r". I dislike seeing the jargon. To me, when used properly, text message is useful. Especially when it's my friend on the 10th floor telling me she can't make it to yoga the next morning :) I don't always check my emails so text can be the best way to reach me.

9:18 AM  

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