We love you Conrad, oh yes we do

A couple of people have asked me for my take on the sentencing of Conrad Black to 6-1/2 years for various forms of financial shenanigans over the years. The decision came down yesterday in Chicago.

While Conrad is probably better known in Canada than in the US, despite the fact the charges were filed in the US and pertain to various dealings south of the Canadian border, he actually chose to become a British subject a few years ago, mainly so he could attach ‘Lord’ to his name.

So, how do I feel? I was expecting to feel a great deal more schadenfreude than I actually have. Following the ego-driven and arrogant man’s behaviors over the past few years, and certainly paying considerable attention to his trial, I thought I would have greater sensations of “Throw the book at the sonofabitch, just for being an arrogant, self-righteous, tasteless snob” but surprisingly I did not.

It was sort of akin to having a wonderful erotic fantasy about someone and then actually having an encounter come true, and finally thinking, after it’s over: “Is that it? That wasn’t so much after all.”

In truth I find Conrad Black to be a crashing bore in all his dealings. He comes across as a sycophant and delusionary. While no doubt bright, his quest was not only to rise to the top (wherever that is) but also to nab a title to go along with it. Especially in the days when he owned (on paper, anyway) the august London Daily Telegraph, he fancied himself on a par with such moguls of the media biz as Rupert Murdoch and compatriot Ken Thomson. They laughably dismissed him as being nowhere near their league in terms of power and influence, an also ran. They would be right.

But, Conrad nevertheless set out to curry favor amongst those he deemed influential in arch conservative realms, like Margaret Thatcher and Henry Kissinger. Surprisingly, he was able to suck them in – for a while.

Another conquest of Conrad’s was in acquiring the bountifully beautiful Barbara Amiel. Frankly I find Barbara much more interesting than Conrad. Nearing her upper 60s she’s still a head-turner and has had all the nips, tucks, botoxing and boob jobs to make sure she stays that way. Conrad seems to be one of those guys who finds it a turn on to think that his missus might arouse other men.

Barbara is terribly bright, and I must confess, an astute and powerful journalist when she chooses to be. While her worldview is a little to the right of the Waffen SS, she still wields a mean pen and is always readable. At the same time, I find it odd to find that her focus appears to be rather than an intellectual one when she enters a salon, than one of: “My tits. Do you think they’re noticing my tits?”

Anyway, Conrad got 6.5 years in some club fed somewhere (he gets sent up in the spring), and we’re sure he will appeal and we’re equally sure he will only do a fraction of the sentence.

But, on the other hand, he didn’t kill anybody, he just played fast and loose with money he didn’t have, and with an ego (in my opinion) that did not match his actual talents. If he’d had genuine talent he wouldn’t have been so swayed by mammon, and would have made decisions that would have kept him from the Big House.

So, I should feel more jubilant that he got his come-uppance, but can only conclude he was a rather sad man and much ‘smaller’ than he will ever admit that he is.