The 'Diana business' falls on hard times
We all have flaws. Even I do (really – not terrible ones, but flaws nonetheless). And the flaws of some are more fatal, or at least noteworthy than the flaws of others. My flaws aren’t noteworthy only because I’m not terribly noteworthy. I mean, I’m moderately important to those who know me, and perhaps even love me, but otherwise I’m pretty much a zero in terms of newspaper copy or scandal sheets or TV soundbites.
But, for the more notable, their flaws are magnified to gargantuan levels. The shenanigans of assorted C-list young actresses are blown up to the point that anything they do is worthy of making them even more reviled by a public that ostensibly once loved them. Should Britney be heard to fart in public, you are guaranteed it will result in a People, or at least Enquirer story.
The same sort of thing happens regarding the flaws of public figures we once professed to ‘love’ and cherish. The martyrdom of John F. Kennedy was staggering for a nation and the world back in 1963, as it deserved to be. But later, as his sexual hijinks and questionable backroom dealings, as well as his abominable record on civil rights became known, he wasn’t so loved. He came to be seen as a guy who couldn’t keep it in his pants, made assorted pacts with assorted devils, did virtually nothing to address the rampant racial inequalities of his day, and even screwed the girlfriend of a known gangster.
What that all means is that memories are short, history is always ‘revisionist’ and we all come to believe that we as individuals aren’t so bad considering the peccadilloes of our so-called heroes. It’s all kind of sad in a way.
This weekend we are coming up to the 10th anniversary of the untimely demise of Princess Diana. What are your plans to mark the occasion? If you’re like me, you probably won’t much notice. Neither will hordes of other people notice, it seems.
If you’ll recall, back in 1997 when the storybook beautiful princess died horribly in a Parisian underpass when her paparazzi fleeing drunken driver tried to get Diana and her lover Dodi to safe haven, it all went to hell, and a lot of people wept. Indeed, the outpouring of grief by a public over somebody they didn’t even know other than from pictures, truly was obscene and vulgar. That was then.
Now, this summer, her orphaned (on the maternal side at least) kids mounted a big show in commemoration. It fizzled. About nine people turned up. Well, maybe more than that, but it wasn’t the stunning spectacle the lads had hoped it would be. “Oh yeah, her. She died, didn’t she?” It's not that we don't care, it's just that we care a lot less than we did 10-years ago.
On Sunday there is to be a service in commemoration. The chronically indiscreet Camilla (the other woman) decided for just this one time, that discretion would indeed be the better part of valor, and will stay away.
So, why do we care less by this point? Well, in the first place it is a natural, and I think healthy human phenomenon. We move on. If you don’t move on you should get some psychotherapy. It’s like when your best friends move away and you are heartsick and you long for their return because you have spent so much time in their company. How will you bear life without the people in whose pocket you were living? Yet, you do. You make new friends and do other things, and so do they. And, a decade later they drop by for a visit. You’re very happy to see them. And yet, all you can muster is to sound like Joey on Friends and utter: “So, how ya doin’?” After that it gets strained.
With Diana, we have learned so much garbage about her in the intervening decade that we are hard-put to see her in an objective light. She really did have a hard time keeping her panties on, and she did consort with some pretty objectionable company, her high-profile landmine concerns, or AIDS concerns notwithstanding. Her ex-sister in law, Fergie did a damn sight better job of getting her life in gear.
So, yes it was a nasty bit of news when this beautiful woman died in untimely manner. But, die she did and, alas, only her flaws seem to have made the news in recent years.
But, for the more notable, their flaws are magnified to gargantuan levels. The shenanigans of assorted C-list young actresses are blown up to the point that anything they do is worthy of making them even more reviled by a public that ostensibly once loved them. Should Britney be heard to fart in public, you are guaranteed it will result in a People, or at least Enquirer story.
The same sort of thing happens regarding the flaws of public figures we once professed to ‘love’ and cherish. The martyrdom of John F. Kennedy was staggering for a nation and the world back in 1963, as it deserved to be. But later, as his sexual hijinks and questionable backroom dealings, as well as his abominable record on civil rights became known, he wasn’t so loved. He came to be seen as a guy who couldn’t keep it in his pants, made assorted pacts with assorted devils, did virtually nothing to address the rampant racial inequalities of his day, and even screwed the girlfriend of a known gangster.
What that all means is that memories are short, history is always ‘revisionist’ and we all come to believe that we as individuals aren’t so bad considering the peccadilloes of our so-called heroes. It’s all kind of sad in a way.
This weekend we are coming up to the 10th anniversary of the untimely demise of Princess Diana. What are your plans to mark the occasion? If you’re like me, you probably won’t much notice. Neither will hordes of other people notice, it seems.
If you’ll recall, back in 1997 when the storybook beautiful princess died horribly in a Parisian underpass when her paparazzi fleeing drunken driver tried to get Diana and her lover Dodi to safe haven, it all went to hell, and a lot of people wept. Indeed, the outpouring of grief by a public over somebody they didn’t even know other than from pictures, truly was obscene and vulgar. That was then.
Now, this summer, her orphaned (on the maternal side at least) kids mounted a big show in commemoration. It fizzled. About nine people turned up. Well, maybe more than that, but it wasn’t the stunning spectacle the lads had hoped it would be. “Oh yeah, her. She died, didn’t she?” It's not that we don't care, it's just that we care a lot less than we did 10-years ago.
On Sunday there is to be a service in commemoration. The chronically indiscreet Camilla (the other woman) decided for just this one time, that discretion would indeed be the better part of valor, and will stay away.
So, why do we care less by this point? Well, in the first place it is a natural, and I think healthy human phenomenon. We move on. If you don’t move on you should get some psychotherapy. It’s like when your best friends move away and you are heartsick and you long for their return because you have spent so much time in their company. How will you bear life without the people in whose pocket you were living? Yet, you do. You make new friends and do other things, and so do they. And, a decade later they drop by for a visit. You’re very happy to see them. And yet, all you can muster is to sound like Joey on Friends and utter: “So, how ya doin’?” After that it gets strained.
With Diana, we have learned so much garbage about her in the intervening decade that we are hard-put to see her in an objective light. She really did have a hard time keeping her panties on, and she did consort with some pretty objectionable company, her high-profile landmine concerns, or AIDS concerns notwithstanding. Her ex-sister in law, Fergie did a damn sight better job of getting her life in gear.
So, yes it was a nasty bit of news when this beautiful woman died in untimely manner. But, die she did and, alas, only her flaws seem to have made the news in recent years.
Labels: fatal flaws, moving on
13 Comments:
r.i.p. diana
her fortunes, unlike those of elvis, who died just more than 30 years ago, and despite his flaws, who's estate continues to make more money than it did when he was alive... go figger
if anyone needs shrink help, it's the millions who still dote on him, not to mention the tens of thousands trying to look/sound like him
sheeeeesh! give it a rest!
Your remarks are spot on Ian. Humans are so morbid, always relishing the flaws and downfall of others - or building up the mentally insane ones. Very sad when you think on whom humanity places their respect.
Hear. Hear! Very well said, Ian. I'm sure that if we all spent more time on our own flaws and less time on the flaws of others, the world would be a better place, don't you think? (Rhetorical, I assure you.) ;)
It's comforting knowing that ten years after I die no one will be talking about my flaws. And even better, the mistakes I make today will not end up on the front pages of any paper. Ever.
V.
It seemed surreal to us. My mother had just died, we had had her funeral, & were dealing with the aftermath. My first reaction was to laugh, almost hysterically. Awful I know, but true.
Everytime I wonder how it might be nice to be a celebrity of some sort, I think to myself of all the embarrassing things I did in junior high/ all through awkward teenage years and how it's just as well they won't end up being analyzed in some scandal sheet.
I really didn't care much at all when she died and was called hardhearted by assorted hysterical "mourners". I care even less now. Why should I? It's not like I knew the woman.
laughingwolf: I wonder why there haven't been as many Diana impersonators? Give it all a rest, indeed.
Janice: I think there is a basic human need to dwell on the sins of others because it doesn't make us seem quite so bad.
Angela: Rhetorical or not, I'll respond anyway by fully agreeing with you. But, of course it's easier to dwell on the flaws of others (and sometimes more colorful) than on our own that might be quite pedestrian. Nobody cares if I go commando, but if Britney does, well, what a scag.
Voyager: You never know. You might have some quite delightful flaws that will make wonderful cocktail party conversation for decades to come. Any of us can even make front page if we work at it. But weriously, your point is well taken.
Meggie: The difference, of course is that you were dealing with a 'real' sadness, whereas the death of a young woman whom none of us ever met could only be fictitious in one sense of the word.
Spidergirl: So just what did you get up to in your ribald and raunchy teens? Now I'm all agog to know.
Jazz: You know, I apply the JFK test to that, as in everybody rememebers where they were and what they were doing when they got the news on NOv. 22, 1963. I have no such recollection with Diana. I saw something about an accident on the TV news, and then went to bed. When I got up I learned that she had died.
ian, you do have a way with words.
I think it's easier for many people to mourn for an icon, especially if that icon is perceived to be "goodness lost" in some way. The grief isn't deeply genuine, and then it goes away.
It's a bit like waving the patriotic flag instead of doing something tangible to make one's country a better place. (Or have I really stretched a metaphor here?!?!)
Well said! Again, why I'm grateful to God and all that is holy that I'm not famous. Honestly, if they pick their teeth wrong they're maimed for it. Who wants to live that way?
Now that you mention it, Ian, I think it odd that Mother Teresa, who died the same day as Diana, has been quite forgotten except possibly by the Catholic church hierarchy and the occasional comment someone makes excusing a misdeed on the grounds of not being that sainted lady.
Maybe it's because she kept her panties on, and so there is nothing to tell which would fascinate our prurient interests and keep her alive forever.
I guess the public will always be obsessed with Diana. Sometimes I think it's too bad that we now know all this dirt about people. Well politicians yes, but others. Do we really want to know how frequently Diana had sex with Charles? Yes I saw this on TV a couple of days ago, out of her mouth in an interview.
But she was beautiful and well dressed and I'm sorry she died so senselessly.
regards
jmb
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