Friday, June 08, 2007

Don't cry for me -- all you 'little' people

Now, be honest, do you think for a moment that a black or Hispanic woman suffering from an undisclosed ‘illness’ would be sprung from jail and sent home to finish out her sentence?

Do you think for a moment that such a woman, even if she were suffering from a severe ‘disclosed’ illness would be sprung and sent home?

If you think that, then you have a much less cynical view of the world than I or a few million other people have.

By the same token did you even think that Paris Hilton would even hear the barred door of the crowbar hotel slam behind her? Honestly I didn’t. So, when that actually happened, I must confess I was surprised and even thought for a fleeting second or so that maybe you can’t ‘buy’ your way out of this sort of a jam. Maybe there is finally a sense of justice in the system, and maybe the outrage of many people over the inequities in our society had finally had impact and they were going to make a test case out of the pampered trollop.

I was so wrong, obviously. The moment I read items about how the privileged popsy had been weeping and wailing at the injustice of it all, then I knew it would be a matter of hours before we’d learn that compassion for the tyke had prevailed and she would be going home.

And, for the rest of the babes in the LA joint the message from Paris’s lawyer, her shrink and Mommy and Daddy is clear: “Let them eat cake – or fried bologna!” “Let them move their bowels in a stainless steel crapper in full public view, but not our little Paris. She’s sensitive and suffering stress.” Isn’t stress and punishment for misbehavior kind of what jail is supposed to be about? Well, yes it is, but only for po’ folk who just simply don’t seem to learn.

So, the next time you’re in jail, follow the Paris pattern. Cry and fret, curl up in fetal position and don’t talk to anyone, get your shrink to pay you a visit and exhort him to run interference if he wants those big retainer bucks to keep on coming in, and in no time you will be back with the big-screen TV, well-stocked bar and abused Chihuahuas. Cool, huh? I’m sure it would work just as well for anybody else who is as smart as Paris.

So, I guess it’s nice that she’ll have a good weekend and can continue to set a fine example for young ladies all over the world. Too bad Lindsay’s in rehab for the 37th time, because Paris won’t have the full ‘old gang’ to go clubbing with. What? Her conditions say she won’t be allowed to go clubbing? Oops, look out! A pig just flew by.

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9 Comments:

Blogger Lily said...

Thanks for putting these thoughts out there. I've run through the same ideas in regards to Paris. The whole thing makes me sick.

11:18 AM  
Blogger Jazz said...

So, the next time you’re in jail, follow the Paris pattern. Cry and fret, curl up in fetal position and don’t talk to anyone, get your shrink to pay you a visit and exhort him to run interference

Ian Ian Ian... you're not all that cynical if you believe that would work for me.

Undisclosed illness? She probably broke a nail...

11:30 AM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

Check out CNN:

LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- Screaming and crying, Paris Hilton was escorted out of a courtroom and back to jail Friday after a judge ruled that she must serve out her entire 45-day sentence behind bars rather than in her Hollywood Hills home.

12:52 PM  
Blogger Ian Lidster said...

Damn, Rebecca, I hate getting scooped when I get on a good rant with a blog. Yes, I'd already heard the news but my cynicism wasn't fully impacted. Thanks.
Ian

1:22 PM  
Blogger jmb said...

Gee Ian, thanks for this post because I would have missed it otherwise. Although I am so out of it on this topic I don't even know who Paris Hilton is exactly, except she's always in the news. I assume she's one of those hotel Hiltons like one of Elizabeth Taylor's husbands was, but only because of the name. Is that why "we" follow her every move?

3:16 PM  
Blogger Voyager said...

I gather from the comments her royal dumbassness got her "rash" or whatever treated with calamine lotion and she is back in jail where she belongs. What a twat. And what a waste of the good her money and notoriety could do for the world.
V.

11:26 PM  
Blogger Hageltoast said...

i'd missed this latest development, but it's pretty typical.

6:27 AM  
Blogger Janice Thomson said...

I guess even the news is geared to the younger listener otherwise I have a hard time figuring out why there is so much publicity about the Paris Hiltons and Britney Spears of this world...

6:20 PM  
Blogger CS said...

This shrink wouldn't even have considered helping her out of that one. Dealing with the consequences of your own behavior is therapeutic.

1:59 PM  

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