So why, then, are your pants on fire?

So, when did you last lie? I mean today, since you got up this morning. According to a recent AP-Ipsos poll on attitudes about lying, 52 percent of the people polled said lying can never be justified, and that they 'never' do so. I think they're lying, that's what I think. I think there are a lot of pairs of scorched pants out there that belong to the equivocating bastards who assert that every word out of their prevaricating mouths is the gospel truth.

On the other hand, a refreshingly honest four out of 10 polled said that they would lie through their teeth if the circumstances warranted stretching the truth just a teeny bit. Or, even a whole bunch.

At a personal level, I invariably attempt to be as honest as ever I possibly can. I try my damnedest not to enhance stories -- too much. That is no small task for a professional journalist, sometimes. I can and do compliment people whenever possible, because I think we all need little boosts to our ego, even if we know it's just idle flattery -- hence, a lie. No man who has any desire to intimately couple with a beloved squeeze will ever, ever, dare to suggest that a garb item makes her look 'fat' when he is asked that loaded question. He might, as the analysts of the poll suggest, advise that a certain other item is more flattering to her, but even there he is taking a risk. Better just to say, "You look fabulous, darling. You always do."

Lying, as we understand it, falls into the broader areas of 'sins of commission' and 'sins of omission.' Sins of commission are the worst, and lead to the admonition by Oscar Wilde, who suggested that liars should always have good memories, or they're bound to get caught out. Sins of omission are a little easier to handle, because they are merely matters of withholding information. "Hey, what he/she don't know, won't hurt him/her." A statement which is a lie in itself. I suppose Homer Simpson's belief that doctors should never, ever tell the truth when somebody has cancer, would fall into that category. Homer, of course, has crafted lying into such a fine art that he still manages to get away with it, with gullible Marge, at least.

The problem with lying is that it is a disagreeable thing in essence even though I believe society would be doomed to collapse if everybody followed the dictates of that lying 52 percent who say they never lie. A lying prohibition would wipe out the advertising industry, medical research, much of the mass media, politics and politicians, and also send the majority of defense lawyers scrambling for work. I mean, if everybody actually told the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, what would be the need for courts of law? "Are you guilty, Mr. Jones?" "Yep, sure am. Guilty as hell." "Take him away, boys." See, case closed. Even prosecutors might balk at such a system because what need would there be therefore for histrionic Jack McCoy to go out and assault his liver part way through a grueling case?

Let's do our own poll:
Do you ever lie?
Under what circumstances?
What sort of lying distresses you?
What are the biggest lies to be found in contemporary society?

In terms of personal lying capacity? Yes, I have been known to.