Saturday, July 12, 2008

I refuse to flip-flop on this one


When I was younger they were called ‘thongs’. But then a certain dainty and delicate dental-floss kind of undies gained a vogue amongst young girls and older women who should have known better unless they were fetishistically enamored of wedgies, and co-opted the thong name.

So, the simplicity-itself Asian-inspired footwear became more widely known by the mildly onomatopoeic term ‘flip-flops’.

I love ‘em and have loved them since I first discovered them as a kid. I wore them throughout the summer in my teens, mainly because I was genetically programmed to live forever on a Hawaiian beach, despite my actual residence on the west coast of Canada.

After I began driving I would be chastised by my old man who would bellow as I was departing for some vehicle destination: “You can’t drive your car in those goddamn things,” he would say, pointing at my feet. “It’s dangerous and it’s illegal.”

“Who says it’s illegal?”

“It just is. Put proper shoes on!”

Actually, I went for years believing it was illegal and my persistence in wearing flip-flops behind the wheel was my little bit of raising the finger to ‘the man’, but in a not too confrontational manner. Then, as I found out later, it wasn’t illegal at all, so my gestures of defiance had been needless.

Anyway, I think flip-flops are wonders. I have a number of pairs, with my favourites being a pair I bought at Wal-Mart in Lihue, Kauai. Rather than just plain rubber soles, they have loofah soles. They breathe, but the sand passes out of them – often all over the condo carpet. I have had them for about six years and they still show no major signs of wear.

There are two reasons I love me my flip-flops. The first reason is that they are simplicity itself. No irksome laces, no sweaty socks, you just slip them on and there you are – shod.

The second reason I love them is because I don’t ‘do’ shoes well. I mean, I like shoes (I won’t even get into my adoration of ladies’ shoes -- no, not on me, on them) and have many pairs of good-looking shoes and boots (and no, I definitely won’t get into my excruciating adoration of ladies in boots). I also have tons of socks. But, I still don’t do shoes well. My feet are wide and somewhat dysfunctional. I’m a Pisces, it goes with my astrological turf. I get ingrown toenails, and my feet sweat and sports and games putz as I might be, athlete’s foot has been no stranger to me.

At home I have a nice pair of sheepskin slippers to go into the garage with, or out to feed the fish. Otherwise, I never wearer shoes in the house, but am always barefoot. And then, when seasonal clemency again visits these shores each year, out come the flip-flops for outdoor excursions and they are only doffed for yardwork when I’m cutting the grass.

But now – but now – a member of that ilk that feels it is their God-given duty to rain on everybody’s parade, especially if they suspect somebody out there might be having a good time, tells us that flip-flops are a terribly bad thing and that adolescents who bop about in them are opening themselves to a host of foot woes in middle age.

Well, I live in that middle-age realm and I am yet to experience those foot-woes – flatfeet and so forth. But, a podiatrist (no surprise there) has offered the warning and wants to see people wean themselves off this evil footwear that has been utilized by Southeast Asians since Buddha was in rompers.

You know, it’s one of those things like coffee that certain ‘experts’ have been desperately attempting to malign for decades, though their caveats never stick. OK, they were right about tobacco and excessive booze consumption, but excessive flip-flop wearing will not go out of vogue, regardless of warnings. They’re just too damn sensible.

The calluses between my big and second toes bear testament to my affection thereof.

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16 Comments:

Blogger Adele said...

lol, sadly i am denied the joy of flip flops by hellishly foul feet. Any more info would be tmi.

10:08 AM  
Blogger laughingwolf said...

lol... i wear em, when i have em... preferred footwear: leather moccasins

ok, cowboy boots in colder, dry weather... then the sorels, when snow gets above ankle height....

10:12 AM  
Blogger thailandchani said...

I have't had on a pair of closed toes shoes since I retired four years ago.

There are still several pairs of flip-flops from Thailand in my closet.. and I also have some Target cheap ones that feel just right.

Like you, I'm always barefoot in the house. I stopped wearing shoes in the house when I picked up the habit in Thailand of shedding my footwear at the door.

Viva Flip-Flops! Best thing since.. well.. flip-flops! :)

~*

10:24 AM  
Blogger andrea said...

I am a testament to the evil flip flop. I love them more than any form of footwear and a few summers ago, while training long distances for half marathons, I spent every minute out of my training shoes in flip flops. The result was such a severe case of plantar fasciitis that I had to quit running and only now is my foot fully healed. Do I still wear flip flops? You bet, have them on right now, but I have learned the meaning of the term 'moderation'. Now it's just my piriformis syndrome that bothers me when I run :).

10:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would go barefotted all the time if I could get away with it. In summer, I have a couple of pairs of regular flipflops for beach/lake like activities, and then a couple of slightly nicer ones for wearing most of the time. I found they simplified plane travel, too, now that you are required to remove your shoes for securrity checks.

10:30 AM  
Blogger Dreaming again said...

I think it's hilarious that those who seem to love to collect shoes and socks the most seem to love to be barefooted the most as well.
(me amoung them)

Can't do the flip flop (sad sigh) the lupus attacked the toesies and YEOUCH! I go for open toed sandals that don't separate my little piggies from one another.

My transition from the word 'thong' to 'flip flop' was a rather quick and desperate forced one ... we were having a mother/daughter slumber party at church. I'd planned it.
"Beach Blanket Bingo" was the theme.
Lots of fun ... sand art, scavanger hunt, beach part food ...
and decorating thongs!
Say what?!?!??!?
er .. FLIP FLOPS!

11:00 AM  
Blogger Matthew Celestine said...

I love flip flops. They are the comfiest ever footwear.

I dont drive in them though. It is safer to drive barefoot.

12:26 PM  
Blogger Tanya Brown said...

Isn't it horrid, sticking one to "The Man" (as with the "illegal" wearing of flip-flops) and finding out that what one is doing isn't illegal and "The Man" could care less?

As you say, flip-flops have a long and storied history in Japan. There are also examples dating back to ancient Egypt. They're eminently sensible in many ways: they conserve materials, allow the feet to air out in damp climates, and can be slipped on and off very easily at the front door.

My guess is that if you, I and everyone else has made it to mature adulthood without suffering Death By Flip-Flop, it isn't likely to happen.

12:29 PM  
Blogger Angela said...

YAY! Hawaii flip flops! Awesome. Must. Get. Me. Some. :)

2:08 PM  
Blogger meggie said...

My Piscean son cannot wear flip-flops, or Jandals as we Kiwis named them. His feet more resemble flippers, testifying to his fishy sign.
It is all a plot to make you buy more expensive shoes.
Remember when they tried to tell us denim was not to be worn by any self respecting human?

12:48 AM  
Blogger heiresschild said...

i don't wear flip-flops, but i love my sandals. no calluses though, i'm pleased to report.

6:34 PM  
Blogger jmb said...

I'm a barefoot aficionado too but I can't wear flipflops. They hurt between the toes. So I have rubber clogs by the doors to go out and water things.
I'm very fond of velcro sandals when I go out in summer and shoes with zippers for winter. Most of the rest sit in boxes in my cupboard

9:20 PM  
Blogger kimber said...

I love flip-flops, and I still call them thongs, even though it might be construed as embarrassing.

Why, yes, I wear thongs. Silk ones, plastic ones, and even a pair made of bamboo.

10:29 PM  
Blogger Jazz said...

I love my flip flops (no, my thongs!!!) My favourites are my Timberlands - I could live in those.

7:44 AM  
Blogger Parisgirl said...

They are called thongs in France, pronounced "tongs". The underwear variety are called "strings".
Just thought you might like to know!

5:54 PM  
Blogger heartinsanfrancisco said...

I love them, too. We are always barefoot at home, me because it has always felt natural and Flip because of many years living in Hawaii, where it's the custom.

Today I am waiting for my second pair of Fit Flops to be delivered. They are thongs with all sorts of pretensions concerning muscle toning, but their main attraction for me is that while looking perfectly flip flop-like, they add a bit of height w/o sacrificing comfort.

10:55 AM  

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