Here come de judge

“Judge not lest ye be judged,” goeth the Biblical admonition. Wow, just like following all of the Ten Commandments to the letter (I know I’m not supposed to covet my neighbor’s ass, but she's so damn cute – Oh, you mean her ‘donkey’, well that’s not so difficult), it’s a tall order, human nature being what it is.

The truth of the matter is, we all judge much of the time. In fact, our whole social fabric, not to mention our system of jurisprudence are based on judgment of others. I mean, we have people called ‘judges’ whose role is to ‘judge’ their fellows. Judges aren’t ordained by God, either, but originate in the temporal realms of a lot of sycophantic ass-kissing, voting in the prescribed manner, and having very little conscience one way or the other.

Do I unfairly malign judges? Probably. Just a judgment call on my part, I guess.

But, you know how it goes. Some absolutely nefarious knave or knave-ette who can afford to hire the best legal assistance and who has good connections is either given a walk or sent to a cushy club-fed for a brief stay; or, on the other hand, a poor sod with no good connections gets an interminable sentence for a minored infraction.

But, that’s how judgment goes.

Anyway, like Jimmy Swaggart, I too am a sinner. I have indeed sinned. I judge and likely will continue to judge my fellows. Bet you do, too. I bet the Dalai Lama does. I’ll wager he’s had the odd negative thought about the Chinese government and its policies. Will we all burn in Hell? Hope not because it will be a mighty highly populated place if that’s the case. Maybe we’ll just be sent to ‘Heck.’

Here’s who I judge:

- the oozingly politically correct. The fussbudgets who deem their lives to be so perfect that they feel it is their bounden duty to take simple pleasures away from others.

- Those in the ‘entertainment’ field who suffer under the delusion that life is not vile and vulgar enough and must carry on further in the direction of utter tastelessness.

- Pretty females who seem to think defiling their bodies with tattoos is somehow appealing.

- Those who believe implicitly that racism and bigotry are confined solely to people of northern European extraction and those of such extraction must all feel guilty.

- Judicial systems that subscribe to the theory that punishment must revolved exclusively around rehabilitation and that there must be no room for that very human need for retribution.

- In similar context, those who believe a mere apology is sufficient punishment for any crime or transgression.

- The dishonest (in a host of areas) that call upon friends to cover for them, in the name of friendship. I say, in the name of friendship: ‘Screw you.”

- Child molesters.

- Spousal abusers.

- Sexual assailants.

- Those who would be cruel to animals.

- Trophy hunters.

- Vandals.

- Graffiti daubers. They are not ‘artists’. Real artists do not defile the property of other people. You want to do public art, then be a pavement artist in chalk.

- Apologists for hideous regimes in foreign countries because such countries are such inexpensive places to vacation in.

- Litterers.

- Sports ‘so-called’ fans that boo the national anthems of other countries in international competitions, including hockey and baseball games.

- Abusive kids’ athletic coaches.

- Those of either sex who believe that sweat pants are acceptable garments to be worn in public places.

- In similar context, those who believe bluejeans and sweatshirts or T-shirts are quite OK to wear to a wedding, funeral, or fine-dining restaurant.

I think I could manage about 500 such items, but will refrain. I also judge those who go on and on interminably. So, come clean, who do you judge?